French Lieutenant's Boys

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Getting my hands on the new remastered DVD of William Higgins' French Lieutenant Boys has been a real treat. The film contains all the trademarks of 1980's Higgins: tales of young California guys spending their days hanging out, cruising and looking for pot. There are other familiar Higgins themes as well: Visiting Hawaii, the paperboys and guys stripping naked in the great outdoors, and all to the beat of a Costello Presley soundtrack.

Several guys also, gasp, smoke cigarettes in the course of the film as well, something that in today's California might lead to felony prosecution.

The film tells the story of a French sailor (Phillip Andre) who's visiting the Golden state on leave from the navy. Everything starts with the famous opening shots of Andre and fellow seaman Lance Francois dancing cutely against a lovely backdrop of the Pacific Ocean.

Thier rowdiness ends up with the two sucking each other, Francois throwing his head back to reveal a mullet. Andre shoves his bologna up inside Francois. Andre's heavy balls slap against his friend's ass. Francois jacks himself off with Andre still inside him. Back in the 1980's, American porn notably avoided showing foreskin as much as possible, including with this film.

However, viewers get a good look at the Andre's hood when he's ejaculating. Andre informs his friend that he wants to see his cousin before their boat leaves, which becomes the thread for his California pre-condom adventure. In the film, Andre ultimately misses his boat, but he ends up with several memorable stories.

Andre locates his cousin, played by Bud Patrick, who invites him to stay with him. They get naked in front of a burning fireplace, culminating with Patrick topping his French cousin, who stays bent over making lots of contorted facial expressions on his face. Ah the thrill of giving pleasure to your just introduced cousin!

Patrick actually screws him in two complete back-to-back episodes.

The guys next go hiking, splitting up to enjoy naked frolic in the California woods. Andre enjoys his self-pleasuring aside a rolling waterfall. Unfortunately, time slips past him, and he misses the ride to his boat.

Sergio Canali Delivers a Telegram

At this point in the film, things heat up considerably with the arrival of the young and eager to please Sergio Canali. Canali is a classic Higgins character - young and cute with a hint of shyness on the outside, yet a sexual wildcat on the inside.

Arguably the hottest episode of the film shows Canali receiving ample gratuity from mustached Doug Weston. The scene starts with two elements out of a time capsule - Canali brings Weston a telegram, the old Western Union kind paid for on receipt in cash. Weston writes screenplays from home, on a tiny little typewriter (a la Francois Charney in another 1980s classic Under the Sign of the Stallion from Jean-Daniel Cadinot)

The telegram ends up being a request from French sailor Andre for money. However, since Weston's light on cash, he decides to spend what he has left on Canali's beautiful ass. Canali massages Weston's hairy legs using lotion. Rolling Weston over, Canali chows down on Weston's giant cock.

Running his tongue over his big head, topped with a giant slit, Canali gives a first rate blowjob. Weston gets Canali out of his uniform, screwing him doggie style in his bed. Flipped over on his back, Canali gets himself off while Weston drills him, ultimately pulling out and cumming in one exciting shot.

The film next takes an enjoyable detour, depicts Weston's friend Cory Adams (Class Reunion) who has moved to Maui. Adams is a picture perfect blond twink, and he has no shame standing in broad daylight outdoors stroking the big meat between his legs. With his winged haircut, Adams looks related to 21st century Czech blondie Cameron Jackson.

Wearing nothing but a jackstrap, Adams stands tall giving the hottest solo performance of the entire film. After this, Adams picks up hitchhiker Bobby Madison, a dark haired beauty who during this time was a very popular pornstar (Matt Ramsey fucked him in The Bigger the Better). On a cliff over the ocean, Adams blows his thick, long cock. Madison returns the favor, and they jack off.

Back in the bedroom, Madison throws a white hot fuck into Adams' boybutt. Adams takes it laying flat on his stomach, followed by flipping over on his back so he can jack himself off. Both guys are perfect sex machines, turning in another of the film's famous performances.

Back in Cali, Canali entertains some buddies in his living room when there is a knock at the door. It's the paperboy (Bjorn Dider) collecting in his route. After paying him, the guys offer him a cigarette. Canali announces to the paperboy "Here, smoke this!" and everyone goes back into the bedroom for a six-man orgy.

With Theo Stead, necklace wearing Paul Dash, Brian Thompson and Arthur Phillips, there are lots of hot moments. Canali tops Dash on his bed while the other guys have a suck frenzy in the shower. Interestingly, Dider is a paperboy who tops, sticking his cock in several guys, while Thompson drills Phillips just inches away. Everyone blows their loads at the end.

In the final episode, Andre gets mugged in a dark alley while soliciting marijuana. The battered Frenchman is rescued by Lee Landis, who takes him back to the safe refuge of his house. They enjoy a beer a chat. Curly haired Landis wears a skin tight shirt that reads I'm the guy your mother warned you about.

Landis talks Andre into pulling down his pants, revealing a rock hard erection, which he sucks. After mutual blowjobs, Landis enjoys a real coup - taking Andre's ass on his living room floor. Andre's facial expressions are priceless, contorting until the top pulls out and squirts a thick multi-spurt load.

The film ends with a coda showing Landis defeating Andre in chess. We never hear from the sailor again. Does he ever get back to France? Who knows. It doesn't matter too much. Such is the attitude of times - laid back and having fun.

Watching French Lieutenant's Boys after all the years is still lots of fun.

-Friskyboy