Dicks of Hazzard
- R. Brown
- Eon Films
- Adam Faust , Alex Cross , Brant Moore , Brent Summers , Caleb Carter , Jayden Holloway , Kyle Aames , Kyle Kensington , Marc Sterling , Mario Angel , Tyler Mason
- Prison / Jail ⋅ Twinks, American ⋅ Wrestling ⋅ Parody / Spoof ⋅
These young cuties just can't keep out of trouble.
Mad Magazine published its very popular issue on the "Dopes of Haphazzard," at the time, and I cannot recall which of the comics featured the adventures of "Bo and Luke Puke," an hysterical joke to its adolescent, male audience.
EON Films continues the tradition, but in the gay adult entertainment vein with the Dicks of Hazzard. Director Rocky Brown goes all out including many of the elements like a souped up red sports car (emblazoned with the numerals 69 on the door), a cast of toady law enforcement officers working for the deep pocketed county kingpin Boss Cock, a car chase and, most importantly, two attractive blond / brunet leads who give this movie vehicle some gas.
The fun is buttressed by Reba Rose Rau, in the non-sexual role of Daisy Dick, who moves the story to its finish, when the bad guys get their comeuppance, and our heroes celebrate with an orgy (a la Ashton's Eleven).
It is just another day in Hazzard County, and Bo and Luke are scrambling around getting into trouble. Brunet Brant Moore stands out at the film's hottest discovery. His strong face and big dick dominate all three of his sex scenes. Blondie Brett Summers seems more shy. With his long bangs, he's a hot bottom.
Caught Drinking MoonshineThe first episode shows him getting caught by Deputy Roscoe (Marc Sterling - Constructing Porn) in the moonshine shed. In short order, Roscoe imposes penal law on the blond, having him sit down on his cock. The scene is short, but ends with a breathless high flying geyser cum climax from Sterling.
Sterling almost gets Summers handcuffed, but the blond brains the cop with a wooden baseball bat. (The things you can get away with in this county!)
The second episode is arguably the movie's hottest. Yummy studlet Jayden Holloway (The DaVinci Load) gives it up to Moore in a barn with bright red walls. Holloway pulls down his friend's pants. His thick cock pops right out. Holloway proceeds to give him some enthusiastic head.
Their roll in the hay culminates with Holloway on his fours, taking it up his hot ass. The bottom cums while getting plugged, finished with a remarkable long range money shot dousing his partner from top to bottom, the first of many from Moore.
Caleb Carter is Boss CockIt turns out that Boss Cock (Caleb Carter - Dorm Days) has a scheme to steal Uncle Jizzie's farmland. Carter, dressed in a large white suit and hat, does his best to act the heavy. Carter has a big cock, and his sweet features show up once he's disrobed. Jizzy (Adam Faust) looks great at the scruffy faced versatile Uncle. When his clothes are off, his tatts, muscular ass and legs look great.
Faust ends up plowing Carter in an outdoor standing fuck, before slinking off. (Carter later went on to become one of the Hot Desert Knights' Palm Springs Sluts under the name Caleb Daniels)
Meanwhile, three local boys enjoy an afternoon at the bar, where, naturally, Daisy Dick slings the beer. Kyle Kensington, Mario Angel and Alex Cross from Field of Creams) decide to strip and have a three way on the establishment's pooltable.
Cross seems to be the guy behind the 8 ball, sitting on Kensington's pool que. Unfortunately, Angel seems content with mostly observing and jacking off.
Tyler Mason gets fucked by Uncle Jizzy. Things heat up when, after a Hazzard style car chase, Summers and Moore decide to celebrate by fucking. There is a quick line of dialogue about how they are not truly related, but really, why rationalize? Considering that President Franklin D. Roosevelt and Eleanor were kissing cousins, that should be good enough for Bo and Luke Dick. In any case, watching Moore throw his big cock into Summers is one of the movie's highlights.
Tyler Mason shows that
You Love Jack
These boys are real handfuls
The Dicks of Hazzard Have an OrgyThe movie wraps up its story in the final two episodes. In the first, Sterling performs a hot topping of Carter (figures, the county "Boss" is a total bottom). And after the bad guys' plans are foiled by Daisy, the boys celebrate with an orgy. The highlights here include Kyle Aames and Faust standing side by side plowing Kensington and Cross simultaneously.
And off to the side, Moore struts his topman stuff one last time on Angel, capped by another heavy money shot.
Sexy models and enthusiastic humping pump up this enjoyable porn parody.
EON Films's Dicks of Hazzard is the version that others' wished they had made so well.